Theodore Dreiser's "the truth"

In the novel A Separate Peace, one of the characters, Gene, starts to realize that he doesn’t like Finny as a friend, but because he is the most popular kid in the school. At the end of page 48, Gene says that something held him back from telling Finny he is his best friend. He tries to convince himself that he likes Finny but thats just because Finny is popular and he wants to be Finny's best friend.